


Bittersweet

by mw138



Series: Bittersweet [1]
Category: Twilight (Movies), Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Angst, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Lost Love, M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-06
Updated: 2014-10-30
Packaged: 2018-02-20 04:26:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 7,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2414873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mw138/pseuds/mw138
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <a href="http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n"></a>
</p><div class="center">
  <p> </p>
  <p>    <img/></p>
</div><br/>Years have passed since they last spoke and each of their lives have changed in so many wonderful ways. Can an innocent email rekindle their friendship or will they be doomed to wonder what if?
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story was written years ago and is based on Adele's song, Someone Like You. It broke my heart when I first heard it and has stayed with me ever since. Out of all the stories I have written, this is definitely one of my favorites. Enjoy!

To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com  
](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Hello  
Date: March 13, 2010 2:10 p.m.

Hey,  
  
How are you doing? I’m sure you’re probably shocked to hear from me, and I debated for a long time whether or not to even try to contact you, especially after all these years. I’m not even sure if this email address still works, but it doesn’t hurt to try.  
  
I hear some pretty great things have taken place in your life in the past couple of years. You’re married now with a child. Wow, I’m almost speechless, but very happy for you. I’m sure you’re a great father and Isabella is a lucky woman. I’m glad things worked out for you and you have the perfect family.  
  
Me? Well, I’m still single, unfortunately. I guess I haven’t found the right guy since we parted. It’s not for lack of trying though. *wink* On the flip side, my professional life has been incredible! I recently made partner at my law firm and I couldn’t be happier…or busier.  
  
Um, I guess I also wanted to contact you to say how sorry I am for how things ended between us. I could just say that we were young and stupid and didn’t know how to handle the little bumps in our relationship, and that’s probably true, but I also know that we just weren’t on the same page. You wanted to settle down and have a family while I was hell bent on making a name for myself. It looks like both of our dreams came true. There’s not one thing I regret in our relationship, except losing my best friend in the end. I miss going to Flannigan’s and having a beer while playing pool with you. But there’s no use in crying over spilled milk.  
  
I hope this email finds its way to you. I wish you all the happiness in the world, Edward. I really do.  
  
Take care of yourself!  
  
  
Sincerely,  
  
Jasper  
  


* * *

To: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Hello  
Date: April 15, 2010 5:30 a.m.  
  


Jasper,  
  
To say that I’m shocked to hear from you would the understatement of the year. Frankly I never expected to hear from you ever again, but I’m pleasantly surprised.  
  
Congratulations on making partner! I know that was a dream of yours and I’m glad it was realized. You’re a great lawyer and your firm is lucky to have you on its team. Yes, I am married and have a beautiful little girl named Alice. She’s gorgeous, Jasper - the light of my life. Bella and I have made a pretty good life. She’s a teacher as well. Actually, that’s how we met, but I don’t want to bore you with the details.  
  
Sorry for the delay in getting back to you. I, obviously, still use the same email address after all these years, and I could blame the delay on work or taking care of the baby, but it was none of that. Responding to you scared the shit out of me and I didn’t know what to say. For years I’ve thought about what I would say to you if we were ever in contact again, but when I saw your name in my inbox, my mind went blank. I just sat at my computer and couldn’t force my fingers to type.  
  
There’s no need to apologize, so please don’t.  
  
I better go. I have to get ready for work and I think I just heard Alice start to cry….actually wail is more like it.  
  
It was good hearing from you again, Jasper.  
  
  
Edward

 

To: [jwhitlock(a)emailco(dot)com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From: [edwardacullen(a)emailco(dot)com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Hello  
Date: April 15, 2010 6:03 a.m.

P.S. I miss my best friend too.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com  
](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Hello  
Date: April 15, 2010 8:11 a.m.  
  
  
Geez, Edward! I was beginning to think my email ended up lost in cyberspace! I can’t believe you made me wait an entire month for a reply. LOL I’m just kidding. It’s good to hear from you again! So you have a little girl now? That’s awesome! I bet she has your hair. You’re the only person I’ve encountered with that color hair, so I’m sure your daughter is just as unique.  
  
Even though you told me not to, I still want to say I’m sorry. Now that I have it out, we don’t have to mention it ever again. Wait, you thought about what you would say to me for years? Shit, now I have to know! You can’t leave me hanging like that.  
  
So what have you been up to lately? Other than becoming someone’s husband and daddy?  
  
Let’s keep in touch. I live in L.A. now - I’m closer to my clients. Are you still in Washington?  
  
  
Jasper

* * *

To: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From: [edwardacullen@)emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Hello  
Date: April 15, 2010 7:53 p.m.  
  
  
You never change, do you? :-) Emails lost in cyberspace? I see you’re still using sci-fi references. I guess sci-fi nerdom never really dies.  
  
Yes, Ali does have my hair, but she has her mother’s eyes. All she has to do is look at me with those big brown puppy dog eyes and I’m done for. She’s worse than Puss in Boots from Shrek, but I’m so blessed to have her. She’s actually sitting on my lap right now.  
  
You don’t want to know what I have been thinking about saying to you all these years. It’s not pretty.  
  
Other than teaching and taking care of Ali, I haven’t really been doing too much. Occasionally I’ll sit down at the piano and compose, but not too often anymore. I absolutely love being someone’s Daddy!  
  
You’re in L.A.? Wow! What kind of clients do you have? Yeah, I’m still in Washington; moved back to Forks after Bella found out she was pregnant. I liked the idea of raising Alice here in a small town. Plus, I love the free babysitting services from Mom and Dad.  
  
Time to put Miss Alice to bed.  
  
Talk to you later, Jas.  
  
  
E


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com  
](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Hello  
Date: April 15, 2010 10:02 p.m.  
  
  
Sci-fi nerds live on **FOREVER**! You better recognize!  
  
You’re such a lucky man, Edward. Sounds like you have a great family.  
  
Come on, you can tell me what was on your mind all that time. I can take it.  
  
I hope to hear one of your compositions one day.  
  
Yeah, I’m in L.A. I practice entertainment law, so we represent actors, musicians, reality stars (*yawn*) and athletes. It’s pretty interesting and I get to meet incredible people. However, the fakeness that emanates from some of these folks can be a tad nauseating. It’s hard work, but definitely rewarding.  
  
I’m heading to bed earlier tonight because I have a 7 a.m. conference call. *eye roll* I’ve gotten better at getting up early in the morning. It only takes two hits to the snooze button instead of five. LOL  
  
I’ll talk to you later, E.  
  
  
Jas

* * *

  
To: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Hello  
Date: April 16, 2010 6:13 a.m.  
  
  
Yes, I am very lucky. I'll never take my little girl or her love for granted.  
  
*sigh*  
  
Jas, I’m telling you, you don’t want to know what I’ve been thinking. Let’s just say I originally wanted to give you a piece of my mind. Then I just wanted to make you feel bad for hurting me. And finally there were moments when I wanted to beg you to take me back. There. That’s it. Nothing more!  
  
You want to hear one of my compositions? Other than Mom and Dad, you’re the only other person who’s said that.  
  
You represent celebrities down in L.A.? That’s cool. Just make sure that you don’t change. It would be a huge loss to the world.  
  
Yeah, I do remember how hard it was to get you up in the morning. I would have to employ every trick in the book for your open your eyes. I remember the time I had to sneak under the covers and…nevermind.  
  
Catch you later!  
  
  
E

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the following chapters we’re going to jump ahead in time a little. Don’t worry, there won’t be huge gaps, but if I continued to document their communication on a day to day basis, I’d have hundreds of chapters. lol During this time the guys will continue to email back and forth as their friendship grows. :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com  
](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Thank goodness!  
Date: May 13, 2010 12:30 p.m.  
  
  
Finally a moment of peace! I swear, some of my clients are like children and need babysitters 24/7. I bet Alice is better behaved than these grown ass people.  
  
So, how’s that little girl of yours doing today?  
  
E, you’re so lucky you have your wife. You always have someone to come home to. *sigh* Don’t mind me. I guess I’m just a little down; it gets pretty lonely out here, especially when I have no one to share my life. I was asked out on a date this morning. I said yes, but at the same time I feel like I’m getting a little desperate. Finding “the one” is a bitch! If all else fails, at least I’ll make another friend...unless he turns out to be a complete freak. With my luck, when it comes to love, that’s exactly what will happen.  
  
God, I have to go. One of our athletes is in trouble…again. I need to charge his dumbass more for my services.  
  
  
Later,  
  
Jas

* * *

To: [jwhitlock(a)emailco(dot)com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From: [edwardacullen(a)emailco(dot)com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Thank goodness!  
Date: May 13, 2010 10:44 p.m.  
Attachment: Ali.jpg  
  
  
Poor Jasper, babysitting celebrities in sunny, warm Los Angeles. I really feel bad for you.  
  
I hope you know I’m rolling my eyes right now. lol  
  
Ali is doing so well! Just today she said, “I lub you dada,” and I think I melted into goo. I’ll attach a picture of her so you can see the angel that makes me want to get up every morning.  
  
Yeah….marriage isn’t quite all it’s cracked up to be. I mean, it’s nice to have someone there, but…forget it. Things aren’t always what they seem.  
  
So you have a date? How much do you know about this guy? Does he share your values? Do you feel comfortable around him? Does he seem at all dangerous? Don’t let him to push you to do anything you’re not ready or willing to do. If he gets too aggressive, call the police or just punch him out – whichever is easier. Just please be careful. You never know what kind of unsavory characters are out there. Do a background check if you have to. You’re a lawyer, so you can call in a favor or two.  
  
I truly hope you find “The One,” Jas. You deserve to be loved fiercely and completely.  
  
  
Talk to you soon!  
  
E

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Edward! You and your rapid fire questions are too funny!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)
> 
>  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Fucking Asshole!  
Date: July 26, 2010 12:07 a.m.  
  
  
I can’t believe he did this! That asshole…FUCK!

* * *

  
To: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Fucking Asshole!  
Date: July 26, 2010 5:25 a.m.  
  
  
Jas? What’s happened?  
  
  
E

* * *

  
To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Fucking Asshole!  
Date: July 27, 2010 1:11 a.m.  
  
  
Edward, why did we fucking fall appart? I can’t tak thes stupid asshols anmore. You were perfect & I wuz a jerk. I dun’t know why ur even talking to em.  
  
Whoa! Two much too drink…I’m feeling kinda woozy.  
  
I wish you ahd beged me to come back. I wuld have, but you got married…to a girl!!!! Did I fuck up that bad that you turned to womin?  
  
Fuck! I just spilled my drink.  
  
I love you.  
  
Jazpe

 

To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Apologies  
Date: July 27, 2010 4:33 p.m.  
  
  
I don’t know what to say. I’m really sorry for my drunk email last night…well, this morning. Paul, the guy I was dating, decided he wanted to fuck some twinks (yes, plural) on the side and it sent me into a tailspin. I drank a little too much and I’m sorry for that crazy email. Just please forget about it.  
  
I’m really sorry.  
  
  
Jas

* * *

 

To: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Apologies  
Date: July 27, 2010 5:02 p.m.  
  
  
Jas, I’m so sorry about what happened with Paul. You deserve so much better than that. Do you need me to come to L.A. and kick his ass? I gladly would for you.  
  
Are you sorry that you sent me a drunk email or are you sorry about what you said in it?  
  
  
E

* * *

  
To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Apologies  
Date: July 27, 2010 5:07 p.m.  
  
  
Um, I’m sorry for sending the email. I’m embarrassed by what I said because it was disrespectful to you and your marriage. Thanks for offering to kick Paul’s ass. It’s not necessary. I do wish you could come here so we can hang out. I miss…  
  
Damn! I feel like such an idiot!  
  
  
Jas  
  


Sent via BlackBerry

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, at least Jasper didn’t drunk dial Edward. *giggle* Poor guy.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)
> 
>  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

**BBM conversation – October 9, 2010 1:01 p.m.**

**_JayDub:_** E, are you there?

**EdwardC:** Yeah. Um, JayDub? I haven’t seen that since college!

**_JayDub:_** Don’t hate the nickname, E.

**EdwardC:** I’m not. I was just catapulted back to college, that’s all. Made me laugh.

**_JayDub:_** And your name is really unique, EdwardC! *eye roll*

**EdwardC:** Shut up. It’s just fine.

**_JayDub:_** Whatever you say.

**EDawg:** How’s that?

**_JayDub:_** Fuck yeah! That’s more like it! I can hear Emmett saying “EDawg” now! Lol

**EDawg:** Me too. Do you know what he’s up to?

**_JayDub:_** Yeah, we email every once in a while. He and Rose got married (as if there was any question) and they now live in Portland. I think they just had their second child.

**EDawg:** Wow. Everyone’s so grown up.

**_JayDub:_** I know. Scary, isn’t it?

**EDawg:** Yeah.

**_JayDub:_** So…where’s Alice?

**EDawg:** *smile* She’s at Mom and Dad’s. They’re keeping her for the weekend.

**_JayDub:_** Cool. Planning a romantic weekend with the Mrs.?

**EDawg:** No.

**_JayDub:_** Oh. I thought this would be an opportunity for you and Bella to hang out without a little munchkin biting your ankles. LOL

**EDawg:** Nope.

**_JayDub:_** ???

**EDawg:** My wife is busy.

**_JayDub:_** Doing what?

**EDawg:** Who knows? She’s never around much anymore. I think she’s avoiding me.

**_JayDub:_** Why the hell would she do that?

**EDawg:** I don’t know. She’s been distant lately, but then again, we were never really a touchy-feely couple.

**_JayDub:_** Sorry.

**EDawg:** Not your fault.

**_JayDub:_** I know, but I feel bad.

**EDawg:** Thanks.  
  
 ** _JayDub:_** :)

**EDawg:** I wish you were up here. It would be nice to actually see you.

**_JayDub:_** Well, maybe this will do.

**File transfer request has been sent to EDawg**  
me.jpg  


**EDawg:** Oh my gosh! Your hair!

**_JayDub:_** lol

**EDawg:** I’m speechless.

**_JayDub:_** Oh for goodness sake, it’s not that crazy!

**EDawg:** Yes it is! Your hair is dark brown and shorter.

**_JayDub:_** Well, I had to fit in with all these slick entertainment attorneys down here. ;)

**EDawg:** You didn’t change yourself too much to fit in, did you?

**_JayDub:_** E, come on.

**EDawg:** Did you???

**_JayDub:_** No. I dyed it  & cut it short after we broke…I mean, well, I did it a long time ago.

**EDawg:** Oh, okay.

**_JayDub:_** Just wanted something different.

**EDawg:** But you would have probably fit in even more with that surfer look you had going on with the chin-length blond hair.

**_JayDub:_** Probably.

**EDawg:** You look good, Jas.

**_JayDub:_** Thanks! Now you can see me whenever you want.

**EDawg:** Wait a sec.

**_JayDub:_** Ok

**File transfer request has been sent to JayDub**  
Me &Ali.jpg  


**EDawg:** There. :)

**_JayDub:_** Gorgeous.

**EDawg:** Thanks! Ali really makes the picture.

**_JayDub:_** She is beautiful, but I was talking about her Dad.

**EDawg:** …………

**_JayDub:_** LOL! Don’t freak out, E!

**EDawg:** I’m not! Thanks.

**_JayDub:_** You’re welcome.

**EDawg:** Hey, do you remember that drunk email you sent me a while back?

**_JayDub:_** Don’t remind me.

**EDawg:** Oh stop.

**_JayDub:_** What? You didn’t send an email to your best friend declaring your undying love. God!

**EDawg:** Undying love?

**_JayDub:_** Shut up.

**EDawg:** Don’t be mad, Jas. I thought it was cute.

**_JayDub:_** Of course you would. You weren’t the one who acted like a fool and embarrassed himself.  
  
 **EDawg:** There’s nothing wrong with telling people you love them.

**_JayDub:_** Yeah.

**EDawg:** I’m glad you feel that way.

**_JayDub:_** What? You’re glad?

**EDawg:** Yes, it’s nice to know someone cares.

**_JayDub:_** Edward, you’re my best friend. Of course I care about you.

**EDawg:** And I you.

**_JayDub:_** :)

**EDawg:** If only things were different.

**_JayDub:_** That would be awesome.

**EDawg:** I better go.

**_JayDub:_** Already?

**EDawg:** Yeah, I have some lesson plans to finish up.

**_JayDub:_** Oh, okay.

**EDawg:** I’ll catch you later.

**_JayDub:_** Alright. Talk to you later.

**JayDub ended chat**

**EDawg:** I love you too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I originally wrote this story in early 2011, Blackberry cell phones were still pretty prevalent, especially amongst business people. Therefore you will see this is a BBM conversation versus an iMessage conversation. :p
> 
> *giggle* So I took a little creative license at the very end. In real life, Jasper would have seen Edward’s last message even if he had ended the BBM chat, but I felt it was important to include one last message from Edward. ;) For the sake of the story, Jasper never reads, sees or knows about Edward’s declaration.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)
> 
>  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Big News!  
Date: November 28, 2010 10:14 a.m.  
  
Hey man! Haven’t heard from you in a few days. I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving!  
  
So much has happened recently and I just had to tell you. You know that client of the firm’s, Riley Biers? Well, a couple of months ago, he asked me out. I didn’t even know he was gay. I guess being a famous actor with thousands of women throwing themselves at him everyday sort of ruins any thought of him being into me, or any guy for that matter. Anyway, we’ve been seeing each other ever since. He’s really sweet, caring, and considerate…everything I’ve been looking for. Someone like…nevermind. Damn, I must sound like a teenage girl. Last night, he told me he’s starting to develop feelings for me. I think I kind of feel the same, but there’s something I just can’t explain holding me back. It’s probably the fact that he’s an actor and has to travel all over the world to work. Oh, and there is also the fact that there are Riley groupies who follow him everywhere.  
  
I wanted to get your advice because you found someone to spend your life with. What do you think? Should I take the plunge?  
  
  
Jas  
  


* * *

  
To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Fwd: Big News!  
Date: December 6, 2010 9:00 a.m.  
  
Edward? Is everything okay? I haven’t heard from you in close to two weeks now, which is unusual. Please let me know everything’s alright. I’m worried.  
  
  
Jas  
  


* * *

  
To: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Big News!  
Date: December 7, 2010 2:17 a.m.  
  
Sorry, Jas. I’ve had a pretty shitty week. I wish I could talk to you face-to-face because I really need my best friend right now.  
  
E  
  


* * *

  
To: [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
From: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Big News!  
Date: December 7, 2010 6:33 a.m.  
  
Edward, please tell me what’s wrong. You’re really worrying me now. Please respond as soon as you can! Call me, text, whatever you need.  
  
  
Jas  
  


* * *

  
To: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Re: Big News!  
Date: December 7, 2011 7:30 a.m.  
  
She left me.  
  
She’s done.  
  
She’s gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a pretty short chapter, but also a major turning point in the story. The following chapters will be longer. :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)
> 
>  
> 
>   
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

I found myself knocking on the door of a house that was completely unfamiliar to me, wanting to kick down the door and run away at the same time. It had been so long, but I had to do this. I had to be there for him. Those few, yet simple, words in his email were a blessing and a curse all rolled into one. On one hand, he was free, but on the other, he was in pain. I’d already caused him enough pain in the past and I could barely stomach seeing him go through that again.  
  
I knocked for what seemed like forever before I heard shuffling on the other side of the door. I took a deep breath and waited. Finally he opened the door and my heart broke. He looked so disheveled, his hair sticking straight up in every direction imaginable. Dark circles marred his otherwise pristine face. He just looked broken.  
  
Without thought, I lunged towards him and wrapped him in my arms. Even though I was there to comfort him, I couldn’t help but savor the feel of his body against mine once again. It felt like no time had passed and we were still happy and in love.  
  
“Jasper,” he whispered faintly into my shoulder.  
  
“Yes, Edward, I’m here.”  
  
He looked up at me quickly and stared as if he thought I was an apparition. I smiled and watched as his eyes filled with tears.  
  
“Edward, please don’t cry,” I said while pulling him back into my chest.  
  
Never losing contact with him in his weakened state, I walked both of us into his house and closed the door behind me. Deep sobs errupted from him as I held him close.  
  
“Shhh, it’ll be okay,” I whispered into his hair.  
  
He hiccupped and pulled back to wipe away his tears with the back of his hand.  
  
“Jasper, I can’t believe you’re here.”  
  
“Edward, after the last email you sent, I had to get to you and make sure you were okay.”  
  
“But how did you find me?”  
  
“Well, when I arrived in town, I went straight to your parents’ house. They gave me your address. I also met a certain little girl.”  
  
All despair vanished from his face when I mentioned Alice.  
  
“You did? Isn’t she as wonderful and perfect as I described?”  
  
My heart constricted as I saw Edward, the man I still loved, smile. It was a gorgeous sight and I was determined to make it him do it over and over again.  
  
“Yes, she is incredible and very curious. I can tell she’s going to be a bright young lady.”  
  
He nodded his head. “Mom and Dad are watching her for a few days until all of this blows over.”  
  
He led me into the living room where we sat facing each other on the couch. He continued to stare at me as if memorizing each of my features and I squirmed under his intense gaze.  
  
“I still can’t believe you’re here,” he whispered while gently squeezing my hand.  
  
I instantly shuddered at his touch, having missed it for so long. It was now my turn to stare as I looked at the sad, but still beautiful, man in front of me.  
  
“Where are you staying?” he asked.  
  
“Well, I thought I’d stay in the hotel downtown. I’m sure they have plenty of vacancies.”  
  
“No, you’re staying here with me.”  
  
His eyes flashed with determination. There was no way I could say no to that offer.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)
> 
>  
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>   
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

The past three days with Edward had been incredible. We instantly fell back into our old friendship, ribbing each other and having a good time. I wanted to keep him as cheerful as possible, but given the circumstances, he succumbed to melancholy every so often. I’d try to pull him out with questions about Alice or reminiscing about our silly antics of the past; that seemed to help, but it wasn’t foolproof.  
  
Edward didn’t mention Bella at all and I found it kind of odd. I figured he’d want to vent a little, but he just kept everything inside, bottled tight for no one else to see. One evening while watching some inane reality show, I decided to really talk to him about the situation. A sudden feeling of nervousness washed over me, but I pushed it aside. He needed to get this out. Even though we’d had three days of hanging out and reacquainting ourselves with each other, the weight of the situation still showed on his face and in his body language. He looked thin and pallid and his smiles rarely reached his eyes. My heart broke for him constantly and I couldn’t begin to imagine what he was going through.  
  
We were sitting on opposite sides of the couch in his living room when I turned to face him.  
  
“Edward?”  
  
“Yeah,” he answered without removing his eyes from the TV screen.  
  
“Can we turn the TV off for awhile? I want to talk to you.”  
  
He immediately tensed at my words because he knew what was coming. Slowly he reached for the remote and pressed the power button. The look of dread on his face made my heart constrict. I moved closer to him and squeezed his hand which was lying on the cushion between us.  
  
“Edward, I know all of this must be so hard on you, but don’t you want to talk about it? I’m afraid you’re keeping everything bottled in and it’s not healthy.”  
  
“I’m fine, Jas. There’s nothing to say.”  
  
I shook my head in confusion. It was impossible for me to believe the words that were coming out of his mouth. Everything about him screamed sadness and he looked to be on the brink.  
  
Inching even closer, I tried to keep my voice as even and calm as possible.  
  
“Edward, please talk to me. I don’t believe you’re okay. I also don’t know of anyone who would be perfectly fine with his wife leaving him unless…he wanted her to leave.”  
  
Edward’s eyes narrowed and I prepared for some onslaught of emotion; emotion that _still_ refused to reveal itself.  
  
“Jasper, I’m asking you nicely to please leave it alone.” His voice was as calm and smooth. He seemed almost robotic and it started to unnerve me.  
  
“No. Why would Bella leave you? I thought she was madly in love with you.”  
  
He laughed to himself sarcastically.  
  
“Jasper, _you_ thought she was madly in love with me. I never said anything of the sort.”  
  
I was really confused now. “What? What do you mean?”  
  
He sighed and rubbed his hands over his face, seemingly preparing himself to reveal a deep, dark secret.  
  
“I think she loved me…in the beginning, but as time went on something changed.”  
  
I nodded my head. It wasn’t out of the ordinary for couples to go through rough patches. Everyone has a honeymoon stage and then feelings sort of level off after a bit.  
  
“What changed,” I asked.  
  
“I think she knew it was a farce.”  
  
“A farce?”  
  
“She knew my heart didn’t completely belong to her. I mean, I loved her as a person and as the mother of our daughter, but looking back, I was never _in_ love with her. She finally figured it out.”  
  
I felt anger building in my chest. How could someone marry another person without being in love? Edward was the biggest romantic out there, so it boggled my mind that he would even consider doing something like that. Plus, it hurt like hell when I found out that he not only found someone new after our break up, but that he settled down with a woman. He was always open about his sexuality, so his actions thoroughly perplexed me and shook me to the core.  
  
“If you weren’t in love with her, why the hell did you marry her? Have a child with her?”  
  
My voice shook as the words spilled out, but I couldn’t be bothered. I needed to know what was going on in his mind. He shook his head and closed his eyes tightly. Moments passed without him uttering another word. My patience was wearing thin and I thought I was going to explode with anticipation,  
  
“Edward, why?”  
  
I think my question came out much more forceful than I intended because his head shot up quickly and he opened his mouth over and over as if wanted to speak, but couldn’t. I gathered up the last bit of patience I had left and waited for him to gather his thoughts.  
  
“I thought if I lived a quote unquote normal life with the wife and kids, I’d somehow, some way...”  
  
“What,” I said, trying to encourage him to just spit it out.  
  
“That I-I’d somehow forget about how much I wanted you.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)
> 
>  
> 
>   
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

All of the air I had been holding in my lungs rushed out in a torrent. I’d wished, hoped and prayed that Edward still felt something for me and here it was, laid out for me, but I was completely dumbfounded and incapable of simple comprehension.  
  
“You…you wanted me?”  
  
Edward’s eyes glimmered with unshed tears as he silently nodded his head.  
  
“But why…why would you get married? To a woman!?! I just don’t understand how -”  
  
Before I could finish my sentence, Edward interrupted. “Jasper, when I lost you I didn’t want to think of myself with another man, or anyone else for that matter. No one else caught my eye or made me feel that spark I always felt with you, so I was resigned to being alone. Then Bella came into my life. She was sweet and kind and we shared a lot in common. After awhile I started to care for her and she felt the same. Unfortunately, she cared more for me than I her.”  
  
I sat still, completely mind fucked, as he continued.  
  
“I honestly thought I could build a life with her. I figured if I couldn’t have who I really wanted, then I could at least live the normal life and have a family. Mom and Dad were happy, but very surprised and confused to say the least. Months before the wedding they constantly asked me if I was sure. Of course I wasn’t, but I had made a promise to my future wife at that point and I couldn’t go back on it. I was determined to give her what she wanted and needed.”  
  
“Even at the expense of your own happiness,” I countered bitterly.  
  
“We were happy in the beginning. As you’re well aware, I’m a romantic, so I did all kinds of sweet things for her, but whenever we got around to sex it was always a…struggle. I knew she was frustrated and I tried to make it up to her as best as I could, but it just didn’t work. It must have been a stroke of luck, or the heavens smiling down upon me, when we conceived Alice. It was one of the few times I was able to actually get through the entire act. I was over the moon happy during her pregnancy and when Alice was born I felt a love I hadn’t felt since…”  
  
He trailed off as I waited with bated breath to find out who else made him feel the intense love he now held for Alice.  
  
“Anyway,” he continued, “I think she always knew something was different about me. I don’t know. I spoke about you, that long lost friend. When you contacted me months ago, she said she saw an immediate change in me. The attention that I once showed her was now on you through texting, instant messaging and emails. She said she couldn’t rip me away from the computer if her life depended on it, but I was just happy to have you back in my life. I guess she couldn’t take it anymore, so she turned to someone else.”  
  
I snapped out of my temporary stupor then.  
  
“What? Bella cheated on you,” I asked.  
  
“Yeah, she met some guy while she was in Port Angeles for a teaching seminar. She said she felt bad at first, but after awhile she thought she had the right to feel love and passion from someone.”  
  
“That’s bullshit,” I exclaimed. “If she was so unhappy, why didn’t she just leave before she cheated? She may have been frustrated or whatever, but that does NOT give her permission to cheat.”  
  
Edward smiled, confusing me even more.  
  
“Jas, while I appreciate you taking up for me, you have to admit that we were both in the wrong. She cheated, but I also married someone I didn’t love and couldn’t have a real relationship with. We were both unfair to each other. I’m actually glad she’s found someone who gives her all the happiness and love she needs.”  
  
“If you’re so glad, why have you been walking around like a zombie for the past few days?”  
  
“I’m worried about what this will do to Alice. Only having one parent in her life is going to be difficult for her.”  
  
My blood boiled as my hands clenched into fists.  
  
Through gritted teeth I somehow managed to speak. “Are you saying that Bella is going to take Alice away from you? Is she crazy? How in the world could she think that’s the right thing to do? It’s one thing to be pissed at you, but to cause her child unnecessary suffering is horrible.”  
  
Seeing my increased anger spewing into the universe, Edward reached over and grabbed my hand, rubbing his thumb across my knuckles. That small gesture was all it took for my blood pressure to decrease and my anger to slowly subside.  
  
“Jasper, she’s not going to take Alice away from me. She’s giving me full custody.”  
  
I was now wondering why I even wanted to have this conversation. I wasn’t sure how much of this fuckery I, an innocent bystander, could take.  
  
“What? Why?”  
  
Edward exhaled loudly and ran his free hand through his hair. It didn’t escape me that he still held my hand in his.  
  
“She said she wanted to start a new life…without any reminders of her failures.”  
  
“What the fu-”  
  
“Jas, I’m not going to stand in her way. If that’s what she needs to do, so be it. My main focus is on Alice and making sure she has everything she needs.”  
  
I nodded my head in agreement. Alice was the most important consideration at this point, and if Bella wanted to start her new life without her young daughter, fine. Edward was an incredible parent and I had no doubt he would give Alice enough love to make up for the loss.  
  
I flipped my hand upside down and entwined my fingers with Edward’s, enjoying the warmth and the feeling of rightness. He smiled at me, making my heart beat a little faster.  
  
“So,” he started, “Now that that’s out of the way, there’s something I need to talk to you about.”  
  
“Okay. What’s up?”  
  
“Are you in love with Riley?”


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](http://tinypic.com?ref=24zhk0n)
> 
>  
> 
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> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

Riley?  
  
I'd completely forgotten about him.  
  
It may sound pretty shitty of me, but it’s true. Besides, Riley is on set somewhere making women (and men) of all ages swoon. While he has been nothing but sweet and great the past couple of months, he’s not what, or I should say who, I want. That person is sitting in front of me holding my hand.  
  
“Um.”  
  
“It’s okay, Jasper. I understand if you do. I wouldn’t expect you to be alone forever. Someone was bound to steal your heart.” he said with a disappointed smile.  
  
“I’m not.”  
  
“You’re not what?”  
  
“I’m not in love with Riley.”  
  
I watched as Edward’s eyes softened and a smile slowly spread across his face.  
  
“That’s why I sent you that email. I care about Riley, but something just wasn’t right and I couldn’t put my finger on it. I was so stupid, but it looks like we have something else in common.”  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
“I thought I could forget about you by being with him,” I said with an awkward laugh.  
  
“So I haven’t lost you forever?”  
  
I brought our entwined fingers up to my lips and lightly kissed the back of his hand.  
  
“No, you always had my heart, Edward.”  
  
He shuddered as I pulled him close. As soon as I wrapped my arms around him, I buried my nose in the crook of his neck. Edward’s body continued to tremble, but I just held him tighter. My eyes filled with tears as it suddenly hit me that I was here with Edward, holding him, _and_ he still wanted me. A quiet sob escaped my lips as tears trailed down my cheeks and onto his shoulder. He pulled back and lightly swiped his thumb across my tear streaked cheeks.  
  
“I love you, Jasper. I always have and I always will.  
  
For the first time in a long time, I felt complete. I reached up and placed my hands on either side of his face, just savoring him for a moment. His vivid green eyes looked deeply into mine and I felt as if our souls were reconnecting and binding themselves together once again.  
  
Leaning in, I stopped just short of his incredible lips and whispered.  
  
“You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to hear you say that. Fuck, I love you so much it hurts.”  
  
Without a second thought, I crashed my lips into his. My entire body screamed with joy as I held him close and worshipped his mouth. His hands settled on my waist where he rubbed small circles with his thumbs. I never wanted to let him go and I was more determined than to keep this beautiful man with me always.  
  
He was mine and I was his…forever.

* * *

  
**_One year later…_**  
  
I walked into the house and was overcome with the delicious smell of dinner wafting through the air.  
  
“Hello? Anybody home,” I called out.  
  
Just then a little ball of energy ran towards me. “Jassy!”  
  
I smiled widely and scooped her up in my arms. “Hey darlin’! How are you doing?”  
  
“Fine. Daddy’s making dinner and I’m coloring. Come see!”  
  
There was no way I could refuse, so I set Alice down and she dragged me into the kitchen by my hand. As I entered the kitchen, my heart swelled as I watched Edward chopping vegetables and throwing them in various pots and pans. I can barely boil water, so all of this fancy chopping and simmering and julienning goes right over my head. He slowly turned around and greeted me with the most beautiful smile in the world.  
  
“Hey, love,” he said.  
  
“Hey, babe.”  
  
“Dinner will be ready soon.”  
  
He walked over to me and lightly kissed my lips. I would have gladly deepened the kiss, but a little girl tugging on my slacks brought me out of my lust-induced fog.  
  
“Jassy, look!”  
  
She lifted the picture she had drawn while I smiled and told her it was wonderful.  
  
“Look! That’s me, you and Daddy!”  
  
I squinted my eyes and looked closer at the drawing our little one created. The two bigger stick figures appeared to have their arms wrapped around each other's shoulders while the shorter stick figure with long hair stood between us.  
  
“It’s great, Ali! Can I take this to my office where everyone can see it?”  
  
Alice beamed as she nodded her head. I swept her into my arms again and began to blow raspberries all over her face. She squirmed and giggled before she wrapped her arms around my neck and said, “I love you, Jassy. You make Daddy happy.”  
  
I struggled to keep my emotions at bay as my eyes teared a bit. I looked over at Edward who seemed to be glowing, a smile stretching from ear to ear.  
  
“I’m glad I make Daddy happy, sugar. I love you too,” I whispered, not taking my eyes away from Edward.  
  
After we decided to give our relationship another shot, I immediately wanted Edward and Alice to be as close to me as possible. Edward was a little apprehensive moving Alice to a big city, but I assured him we would find a nice place that wasn’t smack dab in the middle of city life. Edward agreed to stay with me for a couple weeks, while Alice stayed with his parents. We used that time to reacquaint ourselves with one another more…intimately and look for the perfect place to live. We managed to find a quaint cottage in Glendale and instantly fell in love with it. While I started the process of purchasing the home, Edward sent out applications to various schools in the area. I had no doubt he would be able to find a job teaching music. He’s an incredible musician and any school would be lucky to have him. He eventually found a great job at the [KIPP](http://www.kipp.org/) Academy of Opportunity. When he was offered the position, he returned home walking on air. He couldn’t stop talking about all of the exciting things he had in store for his students.  
  
In the midst of planning domestic bliss with my domestic partner, I made a point to contact Riley and tell him what happened between me and Edward. He didn’t seem too surprised and told me he always felt I kept him at arm’s length. At first he thought it was to protect myself from getting hurt, but now he realized it was because my heart still belonged to another. I felt horrible. He truly cared for me and I hated that I hurt him. He’s a great guy and I had no doubt that he would find someone just as a great to love him.  
  
About a month after we closed on the house, Edward and Alice packed all of their belongings and joined me in California. I was ecstatic, but also a little nervous. Alice liked me, but I wasn’t sure how well she’d take to me on a permanent basis. I needn’t have worried. Alice was a bouncing ball of love and happiness from the start. She thought moving to L.A. was a big adventure and took to the new environment and our new family instantly. I couldn’t imagine Edward not being in my life, but I also couldn’t imagine not seeing that little girl’s big brown eyes and smile every single day. She truly was a joy.  
  
Edward and I fell into a very comfortable routine together. It was as if all those years apart had never happened. I was more in love with him now than I had ever been and he showed me, in every way imaginable, that he felt the same.  
  
It’s amazing how your life can change so drastically in the blink of an eye. Who would have thought all those months ago when I decided to send that innocuous email to Edward we would now be together and happier than ever. I’m so glad I took a chance and am so incredibly thankful his love never wavered.

* * *

  
To: [jwhitlock@emailco.com](mailto:jwhitlock@emailco.com)  
From [edwardacullen@emailco.com](mailto:edwardacullen@emailco.com)  
Subject: Just Because  
Date: March 13, 2012 12:04 p.m.  
  
  
Hey, love.  
  
I know I’ve never mentioned it, but I want to tell you how unbelievably grateful I am to you for writing that email two years ago today. Your kind act not only set the wheels in motion for our reunion, but also allowed me to take long hard look at myself and the type of life I wanted to live. I thank God every day that you’re here loving me and making me strive to be a better father, partner, and man.  
  
I love you with all my heart.  
  
E

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who can’t get enough of Jasper and Edward, I’ve written several outtakes so you can see into the guys’ past (remember Edward having to use “extreme measures” to wake Jasper up in the morning *giggle*) and future. Bella’s decision to leave Alice behind will also be explained, so be sure to head over to Bittersweet Outtakes.
> 
> If you haven’t watched the film, "Waiting for “Superman”, I highly recommend it. You will never look at education in the United States the same ever again. It was from that movie that I learned about the KIPP (Knowledge is Power Program) schools. They are incredible charter schools that foster learning and success in each of their students. I knew my Edward would find teaching children about the wonder and beauty of music at these schools very rewarding.

**Author's Note:**

> Banner by RachelxMichelle’s Banners


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